'I'm fuming with my mum - she won't stop hugging and kissing my daughter without consent'

A mum says she is grateful for help with childcare but has criticised her own mother's actions which she says are 'disregarding' her rules

A woman is furious with her mum for kissing her daughter without her consent.

She is trying to teach her two year old about consent but says her own mother is making it difficult she does not mask for permission before kissing her granddaughter. The parent is grateful for help with childcare but has critcised her actions, which she says are 'disregarding' her rules. The mum shared her feelings about the situation on Netmums and said: "My daughter is coming up to three. I'm trying to start teaching her that her body is hers, and she can say no to hugs and kisses etc if she wants, but my mum is making it impossible.

"She assists me greatly with childcare, which I'm extremely grateful for. But I've noticed that when my daughter says no to a kiss or cuddle, my mum always says things like 'don't be silly, of course you can hug your nanny', and just goes in for the kiss anyway. I've attempted to discuss this with her, but she believes I'm being absurd, and that a three year old doesn't know what she wants, and family should always get cuddles, etc." Seeking guidance, she asked other users how they would manage the situation - but the feedback she received was not quite what she anticipated.

The Daily Record reports that she added: "Just wanted to get some opinions to see if other people think I'm being ridiculous, too? I just want my daughter to grow up feeling like she has some control over her own body. If everyone thinks I'm mad, I'll leave it, but if not, I can show my mum that it's not just me!" But not everyone agreed with her reaction on the parenting forum, after she aired her views.

And one user said: "You're being ridiculous. Sorry to be blunt." Another user also added: "In short if you're not happy with the level of care then you can put your child with another childcare provider." A third user said: "Sorry but you're being ridiculous. Your mum helps out with childcare but she's not allowed to give/get hugs and kisses from her granddaughter. It may be a good idea to teach your daughter that she's allowed to say no to hugs and kisses from extended family and friends but not immediate family!"

Another poster on the parenting site added: "Sorry, you are being ridiculous. It's her nan, she obviously loves her very much and provides loving care for her. It's OK to teach your daughter about boundaries but immediate family in this context is totally different, your mum is a "safe" adult, she is not a risk to your child, it's the total opposite."