'I'm a funeral director and my sister's a funeral arranger - we're both in our 30s our job has brought us closer than ever'

A brother and sister team, both in their thirties and employed by the same company in the funeral industry, have found that working together has cemented their bond "stronger than ever".

Ray Turner, 30, from Wigan, who shares his home with his partner Craig, a hairdresser, initially began his career helping to rehabilitate prisoners. But he was drawn to funeral work, believing he could make a significant impact.

In 2022, Ray made the transition to become a funeral director. His sister, Vanessa Turner, aged 34, a single mother to three-year-old Harley, living in Skelmersdale, was motivated by Ray's dedication and entered the funeral business in April 2024 as a funeral arranger

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Ray works at Co-op Funeralcare in Southport. He finds the job immensely fulfilling and is responsible for arranging the majority of funerals for children and infants in the region. While Ray did not personally arrange the funerals for the victims of the Southport stabbings, the tragedy impacted him "greatly", leading him to contribute to the community's mourning by placing flowers and ribbons around the town.

Although they are based at different branches, with Vanessa working at the Co-op Funeralcare in Buscough, the siblings frequently collaborate due to staff often rotating between locations within their area an arrangement that has brought them even closer.

Vanessa believes the profession is "definitely a conversation starter, and people have a lot of questions" as people tend to be quite curious. Speaking to PA Real Life, Vanessa expressed: "We've always had a good relationship but now it's stronger than ever.

"I know that he's literally just there if I need him, he's got the full knowledge, he's my full support network. He makes a big difference, to be honest, he's really reassuring, supportive.

"So now it's made us a lot closer."

After earning his degree in criminal justice from Liverpool John Moores University in 2016, Ray embarked on a career as a litigation executive while simultaneously working on prisoner rehabilitation. Ray had always been driven by the desire to "give back" and found his calling as an employment coach for those re-entering society post-incarceration, through which he often came across job opportunities in the funeral sector, something that "always appealed" to him.

In 2022, spotting an advert for a funeral director role at Co-op Funeralcare that required no previous experience, Ray felt compelled to apply, saying: "I just thought I'd love it; it's what I want to do."

Ray often pondered life's final journey, explaining: "I always used to think, when you pass away, what happens and what happens if you've not got money, or if you don't know what the person wanted."

He believed he possessed the right temperament to support families during their most challenging times, adding: "I think I've got the certain personality type to be able to work with families when they're going through something."

Upon discussing his career shift with family and friends, they unanimously felt the funeral industry was a perfect fit, affirming it "suited (him) to a T" and Ray's enthusiasm was validated when he secured the position following his interview. Vanessa enthused: "He's really good with people, he's confident, friendly, approachable, pleasant and has good manners, so he's the ideal person."

"He's got such a passion for helping people. I thought he'd be absolutely amazing."

Ray started his role on December 1, 2022, finding it "fascinating and interesting," and noted that his "confidence grew" over time. One of the most challenging parts of his job in Southport is managing the funerals for children and babies.

Ray said: "It was difficult at first... I always feel at the end of doing one of those particular funerals, or even if it's a tragic funeral of an adult, that I can drive home at the end of the day, and can think to myself, I have done something good with my time today."

While not involved directly, Ray was deeply affected by the tragic stabbings in Southport which claimed the lives of three children. "I just had massive empathy for the families... it's awful and it's the worst thing to deal with, the loss of a child," he said.

"But when it's under those sorts of circumstances, it affected us all greatly. We all felt it, and especially working so close to the area."

"Anything we could do to help in the community, we did, whether that was laying down flowers or pink ribbons."

His daily responsibilities involve attending and arranging funerals, as well as caring for the deceased. In early 2024, it was Vanessa who broached the idea of entering the funeral industry to her brother Ray.

Vanessa, who had previously found her work in end-of-life care rewarding, especially in "maintaining the deceased's dignity" and supporting families, made a career shift that her partner Ray believed would suit her compassionate nature perfectly. "She's a brilliant people person, amazing with children, like one of those people that are sort of like a natural mum," Ray said, convinced that her innate qualities would be an asset in funeral care.

"I thought she'd be amazing and I'm so glad she went for it because I thought she'd be an excellent fit."

In April 2024, Vanessa spotted a job opening for a funeral arranger at the Co-op and was overjoyed to secure the position. Her new role involves liaising with grieving families, organising funerals, and ensuring the respectful presentation of the deceased.

During her first few weeks, Vanessa found solace in having Ray to confide in, particularly after arranging a funeral for a baby She said: "I had to do a funeral for a baby recently, and because of my own son, and I used to work with children, I found it really emotional.

"It's a rewarding job but it is hard and you have to be professional. I felt myself filling up with tears and Ray just helped me saying I'm an empathetic person and some families like to see that side.

"He helped me learn that it's important to have a way of relief after work too. He gives me the best advice and I always feel lighter after talking to him, it's helped millions, he's incredible."

Ray added: "On her first day taking her own arrangements with the family on her own, I actually covered the funeral home that day, so I was on the desk while she was with the family. That way I could sort of nip in and out and answer questions for her."

People are always intrigued when they discover the siblings' occupation. "It's definitely a conversation starter, and people have a lot of questions," Vanessa explained. "I think people think it's nice we do it together."

Both Ray and Vanessa shared that working in the funeral industry has made them more open about the topic of death, as well as their partnership in the business strengthening their bond.

"We even talk about work outside of work so it gives us even more to talk about, we've always been close but we're so much closer now we have each other to lean on," shared Ray.

For additional details, their website is available at www.coop.co.uk/funeralcare.