'Being single at 30 is freeing – I understand why more women are flying solo'

More women are entering their 30s single than ever before, but it's not because they're "left on the shelf". Instead, it seems like they have a lot of other things at the forefront of their minds

Women in their 30s are free, single and loving every moment of it - no matter what you may think.

By 2030, it's thought that 45% of women between the ages of 25 and 44 will be single. At least, according to a study conducted by Morgan Stanley.

This means that nearly half of women will move into their "childbearing" years without a partner, and there are a few reasons why people think this may happen. To begin with, women aren't marrying young anymore, as some may say they're too busy having fun.

For a lot of young women nowadays, getting married is no longer a "default" option, as more of us are starting to think about our career goals, travelling the world or simply having the time of our lives with friends.

But there are also other reasons why some women are happy to do life solo, and the pros of being alone seem to be growing. At least, based on what some of us are seeing.

This time next year I'll be the same age as two of my fictional heroes - Carrie Bradshaw and Bridget Jones. Both characters were introduced to us at the age of 32 - and they were both single, child-free and in desperate search of love.

And this, in my opinion, is what makes the modern thirty-something so different. We're not chasing love. We don't reject it, we don't not want it but we're also not actively seeking it out.

As National Singles Week falls in September, it seemed a good time to explain why so many of us ladies are doing things on our own terms. After all, being single and being alone are two very different things.

Sex therapist and relationship expert Dr Melissa Cook, of FunWithFeet and Sofia Gray said she's seeing a lot more women in their 30s choosing to remain single. When it comes to why, she thinks many things contribute to this.

"One of the biggest reasons for this is that more women are now prioritising their careers, focusing on their professional lives and trying to achieve financial independence before jumping into long-term relationships," she said.

"Another reason could be because there is a growing focus on independence for the modern woman. There is less pressure to follow the traditional route of marriage and kids by a certain age.

"These shifts are incredibly empowering for women, and we’re seeing a world where women are supported and celebrated to live however they like - without feeling like they need a partner to be successful. Many women in their 30s are choosing to wait to find a partner that aligns with their long-term goals and values.

"Today, women are able to define success on their own terms, and there is more opportunity to shape lives around personal passion, priorities and fulfilment. A more progressive attitude to dating and relationships has helped this as more people are now viewing being single as a fulfilling and valid lifestyle choice."

Meanwhile, it's no secret that the dating scene has changed a lot too. Melissa noted dating apps and social media have made dating easier, which means some women might not feel pressured to settle down.

Instead, they know they can focus on finding the right partner when the time feels right for them, which means there isn't as much of a rush. Some things, it seems, really are worth waiting for.

Not to mention, to celebrate all the single ladies, influencers are emerging to promote the pros of single life. While many of them admit it can come with its difficulties at times, you can't deny it's easy to see the benefits when you look at the content they produce.

After all, what's not to love about doing what you want to every day, endless travel and not having to worry about what anyone else thinks? The single years are now being cherished rather than being considered a time where a person feels inadequate for being alone because, in reality, there are so many worse things they could be.

One person who knows this all to well is Julia Mazur, an influencer who's candid about her life as a singleton. She opens up about her life and dating experiences on her Pretty Much Done Podcast.

Here she talks about single life, and various other things she has to deal with as a 30-something. She grew up in a Russian Jewish household where she was often told by family and friends to "settle down, find a nice husband and have kids".

She admitted she watched a lot of her friends get married and have children, and she found herself "trying to do the same". But it got to a point where enough was enough.

These days, Julia thinks careers are really important to women in their 30s. Outside of their careers, she believes they also find fulfillment in friendships, through family, hobbies, spirituality and travel, but, ultimately, having financial freedom has afforded women the opportunities to pursue things beyond marriage and children.

She said: "Women are experiencing more financial freedom and, while there is still a pay gap, women are able to financially support themselves more than in previous generations. There isn’t a need to rely on a man to support you financially, and that freedom has allowed women to be able to slow down the need for a partner.

"I also find that social media has aided women in seeing that there is not just one way to live our lives. In the past, there was this idea that the perfect woman was a 1950s housewife who tended to the family, and lived this ideal 'white-pickett fence life'.

"Today, there are examples of women who are living life on their own terms. I think of women like Chelsea Handler, or even the guests who I have had on my podcast like Heidi Clements and Brittany Allyn, who show people how they lead fulfilling lives despite not being married or having children.

"Having that freedom to get to choose how we want to live our lives has made women, in turn, take their time in choosing their life partners. We don’t just want to be with someone for reasons of survival but rather, choose a partner with whom our life visions, chemistry and compatibility align."

At the moment, Julia is enjoying her life being single, but she also hopes she meets someone in the future. She knows this will always be a time where she was able to be selfish with her time and do things on a whim.

The content creator wants to look back on the period as a "special time" in her life, and she hopes other women learn to feel this way too. Not to mention, she knows all too well how hard the dating game is at the moment.

Julia said: "It’s a topic I talk about frequently given my years working on the marketing team at Tinder, and my own experience dating online for the past decade. I actually feel like we are at an exciting inflection point with dating where single people are so frustrated with dating apps, and are looking to connect at events in person.

"My social media feed is littered with single people joining run clubs, pickleball leagues and has even inspired me to start hosting my own dating event series called 'Hot Takes, Hot Dates' where single people show up to compete for an epic group date.

"The last few events have sold out, and the energy is infectious. I feel as though the pressure for a date to work out, given the time and energy put into the whole process is really what makes dating so difficult and discouraging."

When asked if she thinks people are growing tired of dating apps, she added: "Yes, definitely. I believe that the paradox of choice has created an environment in which single people think that there is always something better around the corner, unfortunately.

"Swiping, and the endless options at our fingertips have made dating so fleeting. It becomes difficult to get to know someone on a deeper level when you always feel like there is someone else you can match with who may fit more of your needs than the person you are presently with."

In other words, even though we have limitless resources at our fingertips, finding the "perfect match" may have become more difficult. Having endless apps doesn't make things any easier - in fact, it arguably gives us too much choice.

And, to be honest, it takes a lot of energy to stick to it too. After a long day at work, trying to find "the one" is simply the last thing on our some of our to-do lists.

Carrie Bradshaw may have jumped out of bed in the middle of the night to meet some guy at a bar but, let's be real, do we really want to do the same? Most single women in their 30s don't want to spend their evenings swiping left and right, never mind get out of their pyjamas!

The modern road to love is hard, tedious and sometimes pretty boring. We could spend our times running down it in hope of finding something at the end but, the reality is, we'd much rather put ourselves first.